I made a baby with this man
Henceforth he shall be known as "Mars."
His Best Traits: charming, dynamic, goofy, bright, good looking, passionate, and driven.
His Worst Traits: obsessive, forgetful, dismissive, demeaning, suspicious, and blundering....also, has bipolar disorder.
My Best Traits: engaging, creative, loving, compassionate, well-read, good looking, and witty.
My Worst Traits: dramatic, emotional, irrational, lazy, disorganized, awkward, and accident prone....also, hears voices in head.
From observing the children of my friends and family I have come to realize that best traits are sadly recessive while worst traits are dominant. Therefore, as sure as our child is to have the ability to roll their tongue, they are likely to end up like this:
Awww. Let's name it Skitzie.
I mean, the baby will probably be good looking (as long as it isn't busy peeling it's face skin off because "there's something under there"), and it's certain to be intelligent (which it will probably use against us to prove why it's our fault that it constantly trips over the rug and gives itself multiple concussions).
I can't wait! I'm going to love it no matter what. The more insane the better! That's how this family rolls. Now please excuse me while I have a staring contest with my cat. I have to prove to her that I'm in charge.
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